Seems that one John Hostettler, Congressman from Indiana, has come to the startling realization that teenagers have hormonaly addled sex-crazed minds. This in and of itself is not news. His suggestion for making the world a safer place for them, however, is quite novel. Rename a highway!
“Every time I have been out in the public with an ‘I-69’ button on my lapel, teenagers point and snicker at it. I have had many ask me if they can have my button. I believe it is time to change the name of the highway. It is the moral thing to do.”
Now, I know I am taking a lot of liberties in my description of the story. But the fact that he “has been convinced by local religious groups to introduce legislation in the House that would change the name of an Interstate 69 extension to a more moral sounding number” makes my teeth hurt.
I propose that from now on we all use the number “435″ to refer to an explicit sexual act between three people and a cat. I am really tired of the commute to work and I think a new highway name would liven it up nicely.
